Wednesday, June 06, 2012

where i don't understand at all....

it's holidays. and i don't feel like one. and i hate this feelings. this is where i don't understand at all, where everybody is having a wonderful life every minutes and every seconds with their beloved ones. while i have to share my emptiness with myself.

i feel really lonely right now. having no one to share my thoughts and one to lend the ears hearing my story life. i am all alone. fortunately, i have my sweetheart, my baby. he is all that i have now. sharing the laughter and tears together. though, i still feel empty.

and he's just gone! to pursue his dreams, i guess. to satisfy what he needs. to achieve what he wants most in his life. who says i don't care? who says i don't mind. i really mind. but, who am i to speak out of all this? it's just a waste. nobody listens. nobody cares about my feelings.

when he returns, life would be back to normal, he guesses. i have to admit that too. forget what i have within me. as i said, no one cares. and this is gonna happen for the rest of my life, i guess. for more than 10 or 20 years, perhaps.

i have to set my mind so that it will be easy for the future. well, i don't want my life to be this way, but who cares. mindset is important, really! so i will be strong enough in the future.


Tuesday, June 05, 2012

Quotation to ponder...

it was a wife's duty to be interested in whatever interested her husband, 
whether in politics, sports, books, or a particular dish for dinner. 

-eleanor roosevelt

any comments?

Sleeping with T______Tears!

Its hard to sleep with tears in your eyes
As you tell yourself everything is ok but you know its lies
Its hard to smile at this moment in time
When all I can think out are the memories of when you were mine
Our time may have been short but my feeling will last forever
Even if we have gone our ways and we aren’t together
I miss you so much your all I think about when i’m going to sleep
As I turn on my music and listen to the lyrics and the beat
As tears fall down my face with constant thoughts of you
Iv given up on trying to stop there nothing I can do
You have a hold on my heart and control of my mind
Because I still love you and I think about you all the time
Now i’m sleeping with tears instead of you

Friday, April 06, 2012

He's almost 8 months. In fact 3 days to 8 months!

hello bloggers...

suda lama nda update blog... and i dunno if i still got followers or not... it's being a while since i'm not updating my blog~ u know, life is so wonderful with the baby in your arms most of the time... seronoknya jadi ibu!

and my little prince, K Fahri Zaakir is almost 8 months... jap ja masa berlalu... and now he has a tooth.. but recently i checked, he got another half tooth... oh so cute! he is now loves to bite... gigit me and daddy...

one thing about my son is he loves, i told you, he REALLY LOVES reading. we always bought him books. and it seems that he enjoys reading it although he didnt understand it yet... i think that he is attracted to the bright colours as well as the pictures of the books.

he also enjoys watching youtube... the favourite videos are Aa Bha Tha, If You Happy, The Wheel on the Bus by Mother Goose, and Baa Baa Black Sheep... these are the most watched videos watching by him... what's so funny is, whenever i open my lappy, he seems to know that i have to let him watch the videos first until he gets bored then only i can do my own business. oh my baby!

i always connecting my lappy with lcd screen tv at home so he knows when i should replay the videos. when the videos stop playing or buffering, he will cry and go to me as if he wants to tell me something... this is one of his nature that i, in fact all my family members had understand about him...

furthermore, he is a good boy... whenever we travel he always sit stills on my lap... he always reads, then sleep, then played with us especially with his daddy while driving... he didn't easily go crying although he is sooo sleepy... we are so grateful and syukur to ALLAH SWT that HE gave us such a wonderful baby boy and i hope one day he will be a wonderful person.. insyaALLAH.

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Our prince... K FAHRI ZAAKIR

at last... our little prince was born on 9 aug 2011 after 48 hours i struggled with the labour pain that nobody knows (except those who already gave birth la.. hehe..) i have to endure all these pain in order to see our little prince...

i was admitted to Likas Hospital on 8 august on 11am. the doctor had made a VE (vaginal exam) to me and she said that i was 1 cm dilated. oh my?? only 1 cm where i felt like it was already 7 cm dilated... sakit sungguh rupanya mau beranak ni...

so bukaan rahim baru 1 cm... and i thought that at that moment my cervix is already 80% effaced.. oh i dont care... i really wanted to push it anyway... so, setelah berhempas pulas lebih 48 hours, akhirnya proses mau beranak pun bermula..

oh  before that, on the day i admitted, my mom asked me to rub itu minyak tabuni kucing on my belly. and all of the sudden sakit perut makin bertambah2.. can u imagine like every 5 minutes i feel the contraction... mau beranak sangat2 suda.. if u ada senggugut pain, then u double or triple that pain pun masih juga rasa sakit yg amat...

so on 9 aug tu, at 5pm doc and the crew dtg mau kasi pecah ketuban memandangkan i had been 6cm dilated, ONLY! haha.. dorg mau kasi beranak suda at 6cm.. first baby.. oh no!! so bermula la sesi memecahkan air ketuban menggunakan stick macam kayu aiskrim (tp ini plastic la).. batang aiskrim tu di kasi double panjang and lebar.. lepas tu dicucuk2, dipusing2 di dalam tu.. nda sakit juga ba... (sbb suda biasa di VE) hehe.. i tell u, first time mother mmg malu gilaaaa... haha..

right after that terus masuk dewan bedah.. so i asked the crew to wait until 7pm at least kasi my hubby buka puasa dulu... so lepas tu, with my hubby beside me bermula la proses ajan mengajan... time mau mengajan tu la time tu la nurse tu mau cucuk tangan kiri la kanan la.. mau kasi masuk air.. and my veins pun mmg susah di cari.. so amat susah la sbb satu tgn pegang besi, satu lagi kena cucuk dgn jarum.. i tell you, mmg sedap rasanya mengajan.. SERIOUS!!!! macam mau kasi keluar taik yg amat2 kerasss.. haha.. masa mengajan tu sempat lagi terfikir, oh mcm ni la rasanya mau beranak! haha.. dan, my dad mmg ada masalah bab2 berak ni.. terus i tersenyum time mengajan tu, rasa2nya begini la my dad rasa mau kasi keluar taik keras.. haha.. berpeluh2? jangan ckp la.. walaupun bilik tu sejukkk sgtt..

setelah hampir 50minit mengajan, our little prince tida mau keluar juga. doc ckp ini kes obstructed labour ni.. jd, final solution, bedah saja laaa... my baby ni tida lurus... dia asyik ke kanan ja.. jd dia menghentam peha kanan time mau keluar tu.. patutla sepanjang mengandung tu, i asyik komplen baby ni ke kanan jaa.. oh gitu rupanyaa...

akhirnya i selamat melahirkan baby lelaki yg sihat comel dengan cara pembedahan.... terima kasih, syukur alhamdulillah YA ALLAH~

Sunday, July 31, 2011

Salam Ramadhan!

ahlan wasahlan ya ramadhan. syukur alhamdulillah.... masih diberi kesempatan bernafas lagi di malam 1 ramadhan ini... alhamdulillah syukur nikmat! what is important, i am soooooooooo extremely excitedly happy that i know the fact that my lil one will be born in this holy month! ^____^

first of all, happy fasting to my family esp my dad, mom, sisters, brothers, and NOT to forget, my inspiration- my husband. this is our first time as husband and wife fasting together... hik~ i love you babe...

happy fasting too to all the bloggers, whoever you are~ ^______^

i am now 37 weeks and 6 days. yes. i have another 16 days until my EDD (estimated due date). well, i am fully ready now. as i have no patient already to wait for my lil one. haha~ mommy will wait for you whenever you feel like to come out~ but make sure make it less pain ya baby? hehe..

lastly, semoga kita semua mendapat keredhaan dan keberkatan di bulan yg paling mulia ini. ampunkan segala salah dan silap i selama ini.. 0 - 0 lah ya... saling bermaaf2an la kita hendaknya~ =)

Thursday, July 21, 2011

36 weeks and 3 days!

syukran... alhamdulillah... finally! cukup bulan! now is the moment for me to wait and wait... the baby is quite active also inside my womb... tp mcm berselang hari la.. like today dia active, yesterday agak passive.. until now i can feel his routine..

yesterday i went to clinic for weekly check-up and today i went to see a doctor for scanning. the baby is okay in there. not to be worry said the doctor. i am so relieved when i heard that.. i am having flu.. running nose actually which make me feel uncomfortable all day long... smpi rasa mcm sakit tekak pun ada... i feel like having fever. luckily i am quite tough as i didn't bother so much about my illness.. i think too much about the baby inside me. i have to collect all my strength and energy now in order for me to push later on. hehehe...

i hope everything will be all rights! readers, please pray for me and my baby! thank youuuuuuu~

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Petua Mempermudahkan Bersalin

a) Amalkan baca Surah Yassin disertai niat dan doa sepanjang tempoh kehamilan.

b) Hampir bersalin amalkan zikrullah Tasbih Nabi Yunus.
ا إِلَٰهَ إِلَّا أَنْتَ سُبْحَانَكَ إِنِّي كُنْتُ مِنَ الظَّالِمِينَ {87}

(La ilaha illa anta. Subhanaka inni kuntu minaz zolimin)
Ertinya :"Tidak ada Tuhan yang sebenarnya disembah melainkan engkau, ya Allah. Maha Suci engkau, sesungguhnya aku adalah dari orang yang membuat zalim." SURAH AL-ANBIYAK(21):87

c) Amalkan minum air lebihan suami.

d) Amalkan meminum air basuhan rambut/hujungnya ketika mandi.

e) Amalkan makan buah kurma sepanjang tempoh kehamilan ia membantu memberi tenaga, sumber kalsium dan melembutkan otot rahim dan seangkatannya/memudahkan laluan bayi/selain turut berperanan memperhaluskan nurani bayi disertai zikir/selawat.

f) Minum air kelapa di hujung kehamilan membantu membersihkan bayi.

g) Petua mama - Amalkan makan telur mentah di hujung kehamilan.

h) Kerap makan sayur bendi (kacang bindir) bagi memudahkan laluan bayi.

i) Minum sesudu camca teh minyak kelapa buatan sendiri sejak usia kandungan 6 bulan. Amalkan seminggu 3 kali dan apabila sudah berumur 9 bulan amalkan ia setiap hari.

j) Bagi kulit bayi yang putih/ bersih - amalkan makan buah epal dan minum susu. Selain meminum air soya.